Clap Your Hands And Say "Kidney Infection"

I am going to keep today's post short. I am at home from work for the next day or so recovering from a fun filled weekend dealing with Helga the nurse from HELL at the Kaiser on Sunset. Ive been feeling 7 degrees of shitty for the past week. I had a respiratory infection a few days ago that decided to come back as something far more painful. Abt noon on Friday my right side started hurting. By 3 pm it was pretty obvious that something was wrong. I had my friend Heather drive me to the emegency room. I spent the next two days in hospital where they poked abt 1000 times, did 3 CT scans, and put me in a room with an elderly man with bowel problems (just think what it sounds like when you walk in your parents having sex. He made that noise ALL FUCKING NIGHT). Final Diagnosis: Kidney Infection. For a time they thought it was appendicitis and were ready to slice me open and fish that sucker out. I started responding to antobiotics and so they sent me home. Im on strict bed rest. Ive been catching up on much needed Z's and watching really bad daytime TV. Im going to go drink some juice. more postage later.