Point/Counterpoint: Should Sexy Be Brought Back? With Guest Justin (Birdmonster)

Yesterday Justin (AKA daredevil bassist from Birdmonster who also doubles as a desk jockey and updates the band's amazing blog) and I were bored at work (I YouTube'd like a friggin' CHAMP!) I don't know how, but we got on the topic of Justin Timberlake - More specifically if "Sexy should or should not be brought back." He had some interesting ideas so I asked him to do a point/counterpoint with me on the subject. I think I won. You seriously can't compete with photographic evidence. :-P POINT (JUSTIN TENUTO, BIRDMONSTER): If we're bringing Sexy back, where did Sexy go? Trustworthy sources say Sexy has been spending the last eleven years in Southern Brazil. Others claim that Sexy has been somewhere in Idaho, eating chocolate and potatoes, yelling at the TV. At any rate, Justin Timberlake has brought it back, if by Sexy we mean vaguely titillating S&M imagery, distorted vocals, and impressive whiteboy soft shoeing. I, for one, couldn't be happier. Most scholars pinpoint the death of Sexy around the height of the Nu Metal movement, when bands wore saggy cargo pants and reveled in lack of spelling proficiency. Limp Bizkit is often cited as "The Band That Killed Sexy,"* but multiple culprits have been postulated by experts in the field. The Republican majority in Congress is a close second place, while still others point to text messaging, eating disorders, or the death of Audrie Hepburn in 1993. However, Sexy's back. Or, rather Sexy/Back. And we should all be happy. Happy that it wasn't brought back by Nick Lachey or some other washed-up ex-boy-band leader, but instead the one with a little talent and great taste in producers. Because if, say, the weird looking guy with the flared nostrils from Backstreet Boys brought Sexy back, it might already have SARS and really, nobody wants that. With the return of Sexy, everything will be better. Betty Page will be thawed. Your cat and dog will screw each other. Pants will be outlawed. In fact, I can't see anything wrong with Sexy coming back. Let's just hope it sticks around for a while. I can't deal with our children taking abstinence classes. * See Franz O'Gruggin's work "Fred Durst as Birth Control", Simon & Shuster, 1998 COUNTERPOINT (JAX, THE ROCK INSIDER): I for one feel that Sexy should be left well alone and should in fact NOT be brought back. My reason being can be summed up in this brief photographic essay: See all of these people THINK they are bringing Sexy back and thousands ofpeople will suffer because of their fashion choices. Bringing back "Sexy" will have a negative impact on the general population – more specifically the burning of my retnas. Although I will have to admit this Keytarist is totally bringing Sexy back. MILK IT BABY!!!! JAX - The Rock Insider